I have been stressed for probably the last three weeks. I have not really known why. I assumed it was because of all the grading I was doing. And, of course, the problem I had with my eye going out of focus made grading worse.
However, I’ve seen an eye doctor, who says I’m just getting older. (I thought I was supposed to lose close in focus, not far away focus.)
And my grading is mostly done, except for the 12 papers that I will get on Saturday.
But I’m still stressed.
I thought it might be money. I decided I needed to talk to my husband about it. I thought we had plenty of money, but not as much as I thought we “ought” to have. Turns out we’re doing okay on that. Better than I thought.
So why am I still stressed?
While I was writing I realized I probably gave up on eating correctly about three weeks ago. I didn’t just throw in the towel all at once, but I did start throwing it in about then. So I’ve been eating less healthy food and adding to my fat deposits. That might be why I’m not feeling as well. And not feeling as well might be making me stressed.
I do know for sure I am stressed and not sick, or at least not only sick, because I had a nightmare Sunday night. I dreamed I was riding in the car with my husband and he started talking to me, saying really cruel things. I couldn’t believe what he was saying. I asked if he believed them and he said he did. It was a horrible dream. I woke both of us up in real life, crying out over the nightmare. He reached over to me when he realized I was crying and moved me over towards him. When he was sure I was awake he cuddled around me. It took me a while to quit crying, but I did know that it was just a dream and not true. But it felt awful. Glad it was just a dream.