I have three living nieces and nephews. The third is about to be born in a week or so. (I told her to come during spring break, but I don’t think she was listening.)

But last night in the middle of the night I was thinking of Keegan, my niece/nephew who died while still in utero about seven years ago. I have two others, one from each sister, who didn’t make it also. And I thought of a song I wrote for Keegan and my sister. It’s also a poem. And I was asked to read it at UT one time. But I couldn’t. It was too recent and I couldn’t read it without crying. I think I might could now.

And I wanted to let you know, and them too, that I wish I could see them, and that I’m hoping we’ll get to know each other in heaven.

I’ll hold you in Heaven.
I’ll hold you in Heaven.

Down here on earth
I’ve never seen you smile,
I’ve never heard you laugh,
or held your hand in mine.

Your fingers weren’t so perfect
I cried to see them grown.
Your hair was never tangled,
as if it didn’t know a comb.
I never changed your diaper
or sang you back to sleep
and when I think of all the things
I’ve never done
I only want to weep.

I’ll hold you in Heaven.
I know it’s really true.
And when I get to Heaven
I’ll know it’s really you.

Up there in Heaven
I will see you smile;
I will hear your laughter
as you put your hand in mind.
Your fingers will be perfect
even though they’ll be full grown
and your hair, it will be beautiful.
In Heaven, who needs a comb?

I’ll never change your diaper
or sing you back to sleep,
but when I think of all we’ll do together there
I can only weep.

I’ll hold you in Heaven,
I’ll hold you in Heaven,
I’ll hold you in Heaven,
in Heaven itself someday.