A friend talked to me and said that her daughter has a friend, it is my friend’s friend too, who had finger bruises on her arm, drove drunk twice, and has a stepfather taking inappropriate pictures of her.
I told my friend the stepfather might be fixing to molest the girl. But I think it may already have started.
My friend is friend’s with the girl’s dad and step-mom-to-be.
But her daughter, now an adult in age, told her to stay out of it- that she was taking care of it.
Taking care of it seems to mean talking to the girl and telling her not to drive drunk and that she needs to ask for help.
If I knew that a friend of mine’s daughter were in danger, I would tell the friend, knowing they might reject the knowledge and therefore me, knowing that my child might reject me for interfering.
Which is more important? My relationship with my child or the possibility of saving another child’s safety?
God gave His son up. I hope that we are never called to do that. But we might be.
Of course, twelve hours after the discussion with my friend the right thing to do seems much clearer.
Another question is, even if I knew it were the right thing, would I do it?
It is sad that I have to ask that question.
If she tells and the best things happen, the girl will be safe, her friends will be grateful, and her daughter will forgive her because it all turned out well. If she tells and the worst things happen, the girl will be in more danger and perhaps even dead; her friends will deny that such a thing could be happening in their family and will tell the mother and stepfather so that the stepfather threatens or hurts the girl more and covers up his tracks better; and her daughter will not forgive her, not just because it turned out poorly, but because the mother broke the daughter’s trust for any reason.
I tell my students that if they confess to murder in a paper, and that happened to a teacher I met in Chicago, I am calling the police as soon as I read the paper. I don’t want to be next.
Surely I would do my best for someone else, someone in an untenable position, someone who I might be able to rescue.
… Which brings up the little girl who said one little boy put his hands up her shirt and said another little boy put his hands down her pants. If I know her first name, what school she attends, and her age, should I, who don’t have any stake in the situation, call CPS for her? And what will CPS do? Will it be like for homeschoolers where the mother doesn’t let CPS in and has friends vouch that she’s a good mother and gets a doctor to look over her daughter?… Of course if a doctor looks over her daughter, we would then know whether or not the girl has been physically molested. But in most cases that I read of with HSDLA there is no doctor. Of course most children aren’t being turned in for molestation but for child neglect.
I always have hated anonymous, but in this case it might be better for me to call from a payphone so they don’t have my name and can’t possibly trace me.
Of course I always thought it was horrible that CPS would come for anonymous tips. Anyone who is mad at you could call them. And too many people apparently do just that.
Now, though, I am thinking I’d like to be anonymous.
But I think my friend should go tell her friend.
God, grant me wisdom.